Vulnerability (Part 9): The Conversation Changer
- The Baldy Bishops
- Jun 17
- 2 min read
It takes a lot for someone to open up the vulnerable areas of their life and let others peer in. It may have taken days, weeks, or even years of prayer and internal wrestling for them to finally take that step—and they’ve chosen you as the person to confide in. What a privilege that is.
When that happens, we must be willing to stay in that conversation for a while. If the timing genuinely makes it difficult, then say so gently, and honour their vulnerability by setting aside another time to give them your full attention. But what we mustn’t do is suddenly change the subject to something more comfortable or interesting to us. That shift sends a subtle but painful message: “What you just shared doesn’t really matter to me.”
Jesus never does that to us. He doesn’t brush us off or redirect the conversation when things get uncomfortable. He meets us where we are, listens to our cries, and stays present with us in our mess. His conversations with the broken were never rushed or rerouted. He lingered, listened, and loved.
There have been times I’ve opened up about painful things—real struggles of the heart—only to hear someone respond with, “Well, anyway…” and then start talking about their day, the news, the traffic. It made me feel small. It made me wish I hadn’t said anything at all.
And I know I’ve done the same. Whether it was because I felt awkward, or because I had another agenda for the conversation, I’ve shifted the focus and left someone hanging. In hindsight, I imagine what I did felt like taking the precious crystal of their vulnerability and throwing it across the room. That may not have been my intent—but it was careless, and it was unkind.
Who am I more likely to talk to? Someone who will sit with me in my vulnerability and patiently listen. Someone who stays with the conversation, even when it’s awkward. Someone who, if they can’t engage deeply in the moment, will make space soon—because they care, and they value what I’ve shared.
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